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Jesse and Mike vs Harry and Marv
Wiz:there are a lot of comic duos Boomstick:like Jesse and Mike Wiz:and Harry and Marv Boomstick:he's wiz and I'm boomstick Wiz:and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a death battle. Jesse and Mike Wiz:in may 22 2007 Jesse and Mike made their first video Halloween Night Boomstick:that shit was freaky and had Jesse's doppleganger holding a freaking knife. Wiz:after that Jesse and Mike made a lot of videos that had them going on adventures. Boomstick:it had some funny and cheesy shit. Wiz:Jesse and mike both have pistols and Jesse has a dart gun. Boomstick:not only that but they have power tools that they usually use to screw things up no pun intended. Wiz:also Jesse has darts and Mike has a bow and arrows, also they have 9 volt batteries which can electrocute people. Boomstick:also Jesse has a taser that he freaking electrocuted Mike with twice. Wiz:also Jesse has a third arm located in his stomach area after drinking chemicals that make him grow a third arm. Boomstick:their most powerful weapon is their car which they can run over people with, not only that but they went on adventures killing zombies and maniacs. Wiz:they also encountered several dangerous animals. Boomstick:they also survived godzilla's wrath and godzilla was in his lengendery form they also witnessed the badass battle between godzilla and muto. Wiz:Jesse and Mike also met bloody mary twice. Boomstick:wow Bloddy Mary is a maniac girl like my exwife. Harry and Marv Wiz:Harry and Marv are the main antagonists of Home Alone Boomstick:they are also stupid robbers. Wiz:Harry and Marv have guns and crowbars. Boomstick:not only that but they have canes. Wiz:Harry and Marv are universal and defeated godzilla in the star wars holiday special. Boomstick:but they keep getting outsmarted by a kid and get trapped in a funny way. Wiz:alright the combatants are set let's end this debate once and foreall. Boomstick:it's time for a death battle! Jesse and Mike are watching tv when Harry and Marv burst into the house and pulls out guns on them. Harry:give us your stuff. Jesse:we aren't giving up without a fight. fight! Jesse and Mike pulls out their pistols and shoot and Harry and Marv. Harry and Marv also shoot at Jesse and Mike. Jesse pulls out his dart gun and shoots Harry. Harry pulls out a cane and hooks Jesse with it and throws him with it. Meanwhile, Marv and Mike trade blows. Jesse kicks Harry in the crotch causing him to scream as Jesse throws a dart in his eye. Meanwhile Mike and Marv are still trading blows until Mike fires an arrow at Marv's crotch. Marv:arrrrrgh you shot my dick off! Marv throws a crowbar at Mike injuring him buying Marv enough time to beat him with a shovel. Jesse picks up Mike and takes him to his car and drives away. Harry and Marv jump in their car and chase Jesse and Mike. Jesse turns the car around and the cars collide into each other causing an explosion. Jesse and Mike run back to their house and Harry and Marv chase them. Harry beats Jesse with his cane and hooks Jesse with it and throws Jesse at a wall.Jesse punches Harry with his third arm and tazers Harry. Mike bashes Marv's face with a baseball bat. Marv's face is bleeding. Marv stabs Mike with a crowbar and beats him with a shovel. Marv whacks Mike with the crowbar multiple times. Mike pulls out a drills and stabs Marv in the stomach with it Mike turns it on causing blood to spurt out. Marv falls to the ground badly injured. Mike finishes Marv off by throwing him through the stairwell breaking it and causing Marv to fall to his death headfirst cracking his skull and causing blood to pool. Harry and Jesse trade blows. Jesse beats up Harry and pulls out a nailgun. Harry:not again! Jesse fires the nail gun at Harry's crotch and pulls out a dartgun. Harry pulls out his pistol and the two have a shoot off. Harry hits Jesse multiple time with the pistol. Jesse's shirt is stained with blood. Harry shoots Jesse in his left shoulder. Jesse:aaaaaaaargh! Jesse fires his dart gun at Harry piecing his torso. Jesse throws Harry at a wall. Jesse resumes firing at Harry with his dart gun. Jesse grabs Harry's arm and twists it breaking it and takes Harry's gun. Jesse shoots Harry in the head with his own gun. Harry collapses. Jesse pulls out his 9volt battery and electrocutes Harry similar to one part in home alone where harry touches a generator and get electrocuted.Jesse pulls out a taser and tasers Harry causing his brain to pop blowing up his skull. Mike:we did it! the two high five K.O.! it shows Harry and Marv's rotting corpses in a swamp where a giant snake eats them while Jesse and Mike are playing Wii a reference to their gaming channel as well as them playing video games in some of their videos. Boomsick:nothing like a good old tag team. Wiz:even though Harry and Marv are universal Jesse and Mike were better at hand to hand combat also Jesse and Mike's weapons outmatch Harry and Marv's robbery tools. Boomstick:Jesse and Mike survived the freaking zombie apocalypse and Harry and Marv aren't really good at fighting. Wiz:also Harry and Marv aren't different from all of Jesse and Mike's opponents. Boomstick:I feel bad for the viewers it was probably shocking to have their childhood ruined. I have been there it blows(note:in case you didn't get boomstick's punchline it is a reference to Harry getting tasered "shocking"and having his skull explode "blows") Wiz:the winner is Jesse and Mike Category:Hyper Anon